Anyone who has lost a parent knows that it changes your life in serious ways, ways that are almost impossible to wrap your head around. And it doesn’t matter what age you are, whether you’re in your teens or in your ’40s — it’s a major adjustment. And how you handle that adjustment is instrumental in how you handle your own future. To bury the complex emotions deep within is about as harmful as harmful can get. But to find the right person to speak to and share your feelings with, that’s the road to growth and, hopefully, some internal peace.
This was the road Andrew Garfield traveled when he stopped by Sesame Street and had a sit-down with Elmo. It’s an exchange that shows children (and, let’s face it, adults), that being able to share your feelings is not something to be afraid of. And, for that matter, being an open ear for someone feeling a whirlwind of emotions is one of the most human and compassionate things someone can do.
Garfield lost his mother to pancreatic cancer in 2019. And, when sitting down with Elmo, he delved into how he processed that loss. It’s a touching conversation that shows bravery on Garfield’s part as well as shows that Sesame Street still has its heart in the right place and teaches the right lessons to the youth of the world.
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Processing Leads to Complex but Beneficial Results
PBS
The conversation begins with Elmo asking Garfield how he’s feeling. Garfield responds with “Okay” while also stating that he’s happy to be seeing the Sesame Street icon. But, it’s clear he’s holding something back, and Elmo encourages him to speak his mind. And, after Garfield tells Elmo about his mother, he imparts an important fact:
“It’s actually kind of okay to miss somebody…that sadness is kind of a gift, a lovely thing to feel, in a way. Because it means you really love somebody when you miss them…and it makes me feel close to her when I miss her, in a strange way. So I’m happy to have all the memories of my mom and the joy she brought me and the joy she brought my brother and my dad…So, when I miss her, I remember it’s because she made me so happy. So I can celebrate her and I can miss her at the same time.”
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It’s a nice reminder to us all that it’s more than okay to share our feelings, just as it’s a reminder that we can help others by letting them speak about what’s dragging them down. Many people, regardless of gender, have been conditioned to bottle things up, to keep trauma close to the vest in fear of it driving others away. Let’s all take a cue from Elmo and sit with a friend or loved one when they need to get some heavy stuff off their chest. Garfield’s full conversation on Sesame Street was posted on Elmo’s X account and follows below.
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