Childhood Favorites Become Subpar Slashers

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• Winnie-the-Pooh: Blood and Honey Review: Childhood Favorites Become Subpar Slashers

Winnie-the-Pooh and Piglet become carnivorous monsters after Christopher Robin (Nikolai Leon) abandons them.

Altitude Film Distribution/Fathom Events

Winnie-the-Pooh: Blood and Honey reimagines beloved childhood favorites as ferocious monsters with a taste for human flesh. The copyright expiration of A. A. Milne and E. H. Shepard’s classic books allows this grotesque new interpretation. Characters without an ounce of self-preservation run amok in dark settings with the cruel Pooh (Craig David Dowsett) and Piglet (Chris Cordell) lumbering behind. The filmmakers could’ve benefited from more vision and creativity.

Christopher Robin (Nikolai Leon) takes his fiancé Mary (Paula Coiz) into the ominous Hundred Acre Wood. He regaled her with delightful stories of the talking animals who were his best friends as a boy. Mary thinks it’s pure fantasy but allows Christopher this chance to prove her wrong. They don’t know how much has changed for the anthropomorphized critters. Christopher fed them. His absence led to starvation and worse for Eeyore. The abandoned Pooh and Piglet became carnivores to survive. They harbor deep resentment and take pleasure inflicting as much pain as possible.

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Carnivorous Creatures

Jagged Edge Productions

Meanwhile, Maria (Maria Taylor), a young woman who survived a stalker, takes her therapist’s advice to unplug and get away. Four girlfriends join her on the rural retreat. They’re blissfully unaware of missing locals as they drive to their secluded rental. The attractive besties give up their phones to truly unwind. Lazy days and relaxing nights, bikini-clad of course, in the hot tub awaits. Lara (Natasha Tosini) splashes around while taking selfies. She looks through the pictures and notices a strange creature peering from the trees.

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Winnie-the-Pooh and Piglet swore not to speak. This means they’re silent killers who go about their nasty business without uttering a word. It’s also because they look like two guys wearing rubber masks. The total lack of facial movement and noise saps credibility. They’re also covered, so you only see heads and hands. We get cannibalistic Michael Myers clones from Halloween. Resources should have been diverted from smashing heads like tomatoes to better prosthetics. The film’s micro-budget is readily apparent.

Nonsensical Horror Tropes

Jagged Edge Productions

The cheese factor is high. Audible groans could be heard in my screening as the women foolishly bumble. They literally have cars at their disposal but never drive away. The group could have jumped in their BMW and absconded from the first scream. Why leave when you can separate and scurry around to become tasty morsels? The film takes every nonsensical horror trope to the base level.

Appeals to a Select Audience

Winnie-the-Pooh: Blood and Honey piqued my curiosity when I read about its development. Pooh bear resenting Christopher Robin and turning into a homicidal man-eater sounded clever. Expectations weren’t met here. The film may only appeal to a select audience.

Winnie-the-Pooh: Blood and Honey is a production of Jagged Edge Productions and ITN Studios. It is currently in theatrical release from Altitude Film Distribution.

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